> For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack
> Schitt?
> We find ourselves at a loss when someone says, 'You
> don't know Jack
> Schitt!'
>
>
> Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond
> in an
> intellectual way.
>
>
> Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the
> fertilizer magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep
> N. Schitt,
> Inc. They had one son, Jack.
>
>
> In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply
> religious
> couple produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt,
> Fulla Schitt,
> Bull Schitt, and the twins Deep Schitt and Dip Schitt.
>
>
> Against her parents' objections, Deep Schitt married
> Dumb
> Schitt, a high school dropout. After being married 15
> years, Jack and
> Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt later married Ted Sherlock,
> and because
> her kids were living with them, she wanted to keep her
> previous name.
> She was then known as Noe Schitt Sherlock.
>
>
> Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they
> produced a
> son with a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt.
> Two of the
> other six children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were
> inseparable
> throughout childhood and subsequently married the Happens
> brothers in a
> dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper
> announced the
> Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were
> Dawg, Byrd,
> and Horse.
>
>
> Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
> He
> recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride,
> Pisa Schitt.
>
>
> NOW when someone says, 'You don't know Jack
> Schitt,' you can
> correct them.
>
>
> Sincerely,
> Crock O. Schitt